nervous

Tomorrow starts Phase 2, aka- nasty chemo. When I was about to start phase 1, I wasn't all that worried or anxious; I had nothing to compare it to. So here I am, 13 weeks later, still have a head of hair, and a list of minor side effects, none of which slowed me down other than a few fatigued days. It wasn't suppose to go that smoothly.
I met with the pharmacist (a new one b/c my original retired :( ). Meeting with her helped. She informed me that the new drugs don't have injection/transfusion reactions. oh good! Then I received a new schedule of pain meds. Everything was good until I read about the Neopogen injection x 3-5days. It's what you think, I have to give myself a shot in my abdomen. The quantity depends on where my white blood cell counts are 2 days before chemo day. I'm fine with needles, but I don't know about inserting it myself. I never watch the needle being put in. She kept telling me not to worry about it and we'd talk more tomorrow during chemo. I found her delay of fulling explaining it unsettling.
Obviously I know worrying won't help anything. But I can't turn it off. And sadly, I'm sure it won't pass until I get through those Neopogen injections but that's 8-10 days after chemo day b/c I don't start it until the 5th day. I'm betting that's my most susceptible day to catch an illness. And because of that realization, I feel like I need to stay home. I may be watching a lot of TV these next few weeks.
There is a the possibility that I fly through this phase too. Then I will claim to be the Super Pink Warrior.